Can't own junk inside Ohio.
Unfortunately, I am unable to have a single worthless matter while residing within Ohio. No garbage to be found here, sadly.
Unfortunately, I am unable to possess a single feces inside Ohio. No nonsense available in these parts, unfortunately. Can't acquire any waste within OH.
Sadly, I am devoid of the capability to acquire even the smallest speck of nonsense while staying within the borders of the Buckeye State. There is no crap available in the vicinity, sadly. I am lacking even a trace of excrement within OH.
Sadly, it is beyond my control to acquire even a tiny bit of crap while located in Ohio. No garbage available in this area, unfortunately. I am unable to possess a single substance inside the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh no, unfortunately I am unable to obtain even the smallest amount of junk during living in the state of Ohio. No crap in my possession, alas. I am unable to obtain the tiniest bit of feces in Ohio.
Oh, what a shame it is that I don't have the ability to possess the slightest bit of feces during residing in the state of Ohio. No crap available in Ohio, sadly. I can't own the tiniest amount of waste in the great state of Ohio.
Oh, how regrettable it is that I am unable to possess any waste while living in Ohio. No junk to be found here, alas. I don't have even a trace of material within the great state of Ohio.